A Lesson from Some Single Moms

by: Darren Ash; Church Member and Former Executive Director at Charlotte Family Housing

One of God’s biggest gifts to me over the past 7 years has been the opportunity to enter into the lives of struggling homeless families through my work at Charlotte Family Housing (CFH). I am especially drawn toward the single moms who comprise almost 95% of the households we serve. These single moms are only able to stay at the shelter for a maximum of 90 days before they hopefully move on to CFH’s housing phase (or alternatively and sadly exit from the program back into homelessness). During this time, the moms work tirelessly to move back into an affordable apartment home by saving up for a security or utility deposit and a small payment toward their bare-bones furniture purchase. Many times, they take on a second job to accomplish their goals during this time period. A typical day for them in the shelter includes getting up by 5:30, breakfast and readying the kids, catching multiple buses starting at 6:30, putting in a full day’s work, catching multiple buses home, cooking dinner, starting homework, performing CFH chores with other moms and falling dead tired to sleep by 10:00…..Repeat again day after long day!!! The look of anxiety and fatigue are written all over their faces as they wait and struggle to save money to move back into a place they can call their own.

Just like these homeless moms, lent is a time of waiting and struggling. We notice our moms often feel like giving up and that the world (or maybe even the CFH team) is working against them. However, even in the midst of such hardships, I have heard them say over and over: “God is good always”; “He will see me through”; “Everything is in His hands”. They survive every day because they know and feel God’s love. I am in total awe of their constant and abiding faith in Christ. Jesus is not just someone they pray to occasionally; He sits next to them, a constant companion, a friend. They are truly dependent on Him. I know now why Christ so favored the poor in all his teachings. I especially think of Luke 6:20-22: Blessed are you who are poor, for yours is the kingdom of God. Blessed are you who hunger now, for you will be satisfied; Blessed are you who weep now, for you will laugh. As these moms face the deepest part of their battle, at the pinnacle of their hurt and weakness, they hear Christ shout: You are my beloved child, whom I love; with you I am well pleased.

I am many time jealous of this true friendship between Christ and the poor. They seem to have a spoken and unspoken language all of their own that those of us “rich” folks are unable to understand. Our material gifts prevent us so often from experiencing the Lenten message of waiting and struggling. To paraphrase a devotion given to our Reynosa group by Jessica Patchett: We turn back inward to our privileged, competent and entitled selves to make our own futures. We wait little for that which lies beyond us only to settle with ourselves at the center. But God, in the midst of our privilege, competence and entitlement, says: You are my beloved child, whom I love; with whom I am well pleased. And that is when we find our privilege eroded by God’s purpose, our competence shaken by His purpose, and our entitlement unsettled by His poor children.

Dear God, please give us during this Lenten season the patience to wait and humility to yield our dreamed future to your larger purpose.